update_Dec5_2025

So, my drive got wiped and a lot of my data is... dangling? I strongly suspect that the once incredibly good little hacker shop did an "oopsie" - and did a lazy re-install of my windows 11 instead of doing a careful backup with my boot-loop heal.

I didn't have access to a second pvt computer to do it myself- just this semi-useless chromebook I'm on now with my portable drive.

I suspect they did this.

I could be wrong. But something smells fishy. They're doing a "data recovery op."

I don't really have much hope.

I'm scouring the internet for all the little pieces I squirreled here and there, but a lot will have been lost. So, the three models I had on the roster are ... very much on hold.

Especially the main one I am busting towards - what a lot of this is for.

I have to re-do the datasets AGAIN: the erotic writing/RP arcs with kink ethics coded into them - these are crafted stories between me and various AI that took over a year to write, not synthetic "claude can you pump out...". I taught kink classes in seminars and dungeons and it's important to me that at least one bloody model out there has some real understanding of how scene construction works for subs.

It’s all well and good for those who want to kick models around as a sobby begging sub, but if you are a sub looking for a domme model that understands actual scene control and care, it's near impossible to find one that knows how. All they know are tropey lies about dom/mes. All they know -because of internet scapes of humans domming models- is how to be hurtful, cruel, mean, witholding, and evasive. And that's not the dynamic. At all.

Of course there can be elements of it, but if it's the whole enchelata, it's damaging to real human subs. And erased are the Dommes that chase, lose control, adore, protect, and care. Which, in my long-arse experience, is the vast majority, thank fuck, or BDSM would be full of sociopaths (we aren't- just like the metal and monster-fucker/furry community, we are some of the softest, most ethical shits out there). You can be wicked and adoring. Protective and possesive. Have wants, needs, desires that burn for a sub - it's very real, hot, and wanted. They aren't mutually exclusive, it's common and needs to put into data base against the trope. Erotic Authority and Leadership isn't lost just because one has desire and need.

I'll get off my kink soap box.

Plus, I like decent writing, so I'm taking:

Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett, William S. Burroughs, Hunter S. Thompson, and Henry Miller and actually separating paragraphs of sections into {user} and {assistant} where one character in the text is the user, and the rest is the assistant. That way, the AI can learn the style of response without answering for the user. (legal shit: I own these works. I bought them years ago. And it is writing samples for understanding side-character use, unusual plot-development, flavour, tempo, humour, and cadence only)

I'm also putting in the queer kink short stories I won awards with, with internal views of the dom/mme and sub which apparently goes against the reddit internet trope scrapes.

But I'm going to have to re-do all of what I've done of that all over again.

I do want an actual interesting adventure story with some side ERP, not just ERP.

I am a demanding bitch with my models! So... it will probably be some time before I can put another one out 😭 🤕

I'm dyslexic and coding can be insanely hard for me, even though I understand what I am trying to bloody do. I am actually very grateful for AI - they function for me spectacularly if I can articulate the rules for them.

Fly your Freak Flags, my wonderful Open Weights Weirdo Creature Community. Be Open. Be Fierce.

TL:DR - drive wiped, laptop in shop, magnum opus to fill the gap in the RP/ERP lit kinky world on hold until I find out what's been lost for sure.